💀 weirdgirl zine 💜

 yass kween… i mean princess, it is time to slaaaaaaaaay. slay the princess is hard af. the first time i beat it i think i was even more shocked than my home slice, yuraiya! we couldn't believe i actually accomplished something instead of just dying for the 8675309th time in a row! you gotta think so far outside the box in this game that the box doesn't even exist anymore. it's not like anything i've ever played, and it blew my brains out of my ass until i finally understood it. i mostly play games to compete against myself & feel satisfied when i somehow don't mess up. slay the princess gives me that exact fire under my ass to try harder. such complex emotions - makes me excited, angry, amused, & satisfied all at once. sooooo good. the surrealism & dangers plus art style remind me a bit of don't starve, only there’s more than just life to worry about; there’s a whole universe cluster. they both have that trippy, macabre whimsy edward gorey vibe. pic...

fuckboy day is celebrated annually on february 22nd (with optional "half-fuckboy day” or, as i call it, fuckboy day junior, with bonfires on august 22nd) is a therapeutic holiday with rituals focused on self-reflection & growth. we gather around a puri-fire (bonfire or other source), ceremonially burning cursed fuckboy artifacts of past negative situations. the fuckboy feast follows, featuring weenz (hot dogs or sausages, pick your own condiments, vegan is fine! ) & tacocats (sweet treats in taco shells). then, after or around tacocats dessert, participants share stories, receive bestowances of big ups (bobu’s), & celebrate personal growth. it is a day of growth, vulnerability, humor, & accountability. we, the participants of the holiday, are the core characters. we share stories & experiences, supporting each other's growth. we engage in the ritual's symbolic actions, perhaps by participating in customs like fuckboy feasts, wearing holiday colors (blac...

get your weenzrods ready for footlong Frank, cuz here’s the poop on the upcoming fuckboy day weekend…  { also  enjoy the fuckboy day wordscape glossary here .  }  as well, for more terms and info. legend says seeing pink fur, glitter, or omg paint — on your clothes around fuckboy day means you're shitlisted by yuraiya, a playful warning (friends often glitter bomb & other pranks).   at the fuckboy feast we have the meat, the sweet, the condiments & the char.  the puri-fire's flames symbolize the burning away of negativity.  the weenz, roasted over the fire, represent the meat of life's experiences, while tacocats represent the sweet balance.   footlong frank's presence symbolizes generosity & community.   the four sacred colors—pink (nourishment), red (passion, blood, ketchup), yellow (caution, fear, ‘stard), & black (the char, unknown, & unbiased perspective)—guide participants toward self-improvement & healthy relati...

1. Your coffee suddenly tastes like cat pee 2. Your bed is mysteriously pink-tinted 3. All your black clothes have a single pink hair 4. Your vampire powers mysteriously malfunction any time of day 5. Your spellbook pages have pink paw prints on them 6. Your plasma fruit smoothie feels suspiciously furry 7. Your familiars start avoiding you 8. Your computer crashes in pink glitches 9. Your garlic bread remains mysteriously fresh 10. Your mirror reflection shows judgemental cat eyes staring back at you

sadlump openly seeks pity declaring he isn’t good enough to talk to, but he wants friendship… unless you’d prefer to “shock” him with your beautiful body. but no pressure… only if you want friend who “understands u.” 😂   click below for screenshots!! happy Valentine’s Day! this is an interaction on a friending app—a deadass nightmare—where i, an innocent little baby bun seeking gaming buddies, was instead hit on by dingdongs from thousands of miles away. these weren't just awkward advances; they were full-blown attempts to treat me like a whorehouse resident. one guy, in particular, wouldn't boot even when i repeatedly said dassit. the suicide thing was a last resort. pro tip: someone plays the suicide card after not getting flirts or nudes… i suggest hopping ass out the door, fellow baby buns. crucial app don'ts: avoid pressuring potential friends, respect boundaries, don’t threaten suicide, and remember, friendship isn't a consolation prize. let's dive into th...

It’s about that time of year again! Let’s review some fun terms related to our favorite holiday, fuckboy day. bestowance of big ups (bobu): positive affirmations & encouragement given to support each other's growth & healing. cursed artifacts: negative things, actual objects, or even unwanted bandits & feelings. prep them for the purging puri-fire. fuckboy feast: the ritual after the puri-fire purge. a sumptuous dinner & story regaling of fuckboys past. often funny & scary. fuckboy: a person who engages in harmful or manipulative romantic behavior. fuckfool: a person who engages in harmful or manipulative romantic behavior. fuckgirl: a person who engages in harmful or manipulative romantic behavior. footlong frank: mascot of fuckboy day, wears a hot dog costume, representing generosity & community. ketchup: sacred red condiment of fuckboy day, it symbolizes the blood & passion that flows inside us all. meat, the: dinner portion of the fuckboy feast whic...

from the archives 6 months ago. had to laugh. all damn year i be getting the same shit from danny devito that i get from everyone else… only he was too scared to fuck, so there wasn’t much point to it but time wasting. men on the internet are almost all the same.. 🥺🥺🥺mommy can i pwease hav sum pixel pussy but only if you’re a 10🥺🥺🥺 half of them just want text buddies and emotional support whores… but they can’t even read, so where does that leave a hyperliterate bitch like me?

holy sh1t j1zz, my new cake tank is theee vibe! the cherry zkittlez was so good it made my piggies wiggle, candy store realness that gives even fancy-pants brands a run for their money. it's flat and sneaky like a ninja (or pack o gum), perfect for when i need to be subtle about my medication situation… and can we talk about how i can match it to my hair? that's some next-level aesthetic planning right there. no leaks (unlike that one ex who didn’t know how condoms worked), solid battery life, and it's just so pretty i could cry. this tank gives me everything i need and then some! 💰💰💰💰💰(5/5) awesome price point ⚙️⚙️⚙️⚙️ (4/5) sturdy, stylish 🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃 (5/5) yum, STRONG GRADE: A+, slice of heaven!

another crazy one dude, felt sooo awk at this bougie writer ladies group - but door prizes were fireeee … this gorgeous violet liqueur in a pretty bottle, & a godiva truffle box with all these fancy cake flavors, pink and black forest dark chocolate with cherry brandy. (ok, i am a lil chocolate crazy.) i won some fancy olives... not too shabby! then the dentist, came home to find rebecca & her bf ate half my damn olives 🫒 🤣 i can use the rest in a cobb salad maybe tomorrow. for now i'm just waiting for veggies to boil, chopped 'em up for matzo ball soup since i need to chew gentle for a while. a truffle would've been perfect right now though, ngl (or hell the booze too - my temp crown hurts!) 😂 

    just adding my fuckboy day 2025 vomit-tines card collection! before the purge we might have some light socializing . then we meditate upon the fuckfools of the year and our involvement. have we too much ‘stard? need we more? are we ketchupping with vigor and vim? are we nourishing ourselves, working for the meat and rewarding with the sweet? the weenz, roasted over the fire, represent the "meat" of life's experiences, while tacocats represent the "sweet" balance. footlong frank's presence symbolizes generosity and community. the four sacred colors—pink (nourishment), red (redirected passion), yellow (caution), and black (unbiased perspective)—guide participants toward self-improvement and healthy relationships. the stories shared during the feast become part of the evolving lore, passed down from year to year.

lately, guys keep asking if i want to see their dicks. like, why would i want to see some strange dick that's not actively in the process of giving me enjoyment? hard pass. tbh i'd rather wank. or just like… anything. deal with my brickshits from porphyria constipation, maybe?

meditating on february’s vibe, i go to the principle of cyclical return: we have choices, opportunities, people… the best will return to us. eventually, everything comes back around anyway. i sometimes make offerings to vaiva this month, since she rules both over the underworld and the rainbow, tossing flowers or coins or unwrapped candy into the nearest body of water. her mercurial nature reflects the unpredictable nature of cycles. this month’s superstition: finding a smooth, grey stone on your february tourney brings vaiva's blessing for the coming year.

skip "rabbit rabbit" on february 1st, and watch spacetime unravel, you horny wankers! phyllis is here, and your romantic dinners are cancelled. this valentine's day, it's a bloodbath—a romantic apocalypse! forget "rabbit rabbit," and prepare for a month of romantic disasters so spectacularly awful, they'll make you question your very existence. picture this: unspeakable stds that'll have your peepee dripping with regret, dates from hell who'll not only get restraining orders but will also post your most embarrassing photos online, and your deepest, darkest secrets broadcast to your ex and their entire extended family. consider it phyllis's special valentine's day gift – a festering wound of heartbreak, regret, and public humiliation. say "rabbit rabbit," you pathetic wankers, or face the massacre!