💾 the dirty qwerty, #004 a very special episode: never go bitch to Butch

💾 dirty qwerty, #004 a very special episode: never go bitch to Butch

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“bitch” > “Butch”

lowercase emotional vent? mid-rant? soft lil “bitch please” to no one in particular congrats, kid. apple thinks you meant to summon your deadish twinnish brother.

🧠 keyboard logic:

 b and b: fine

 i > u: shady side-switch — real qwerty demons

 t > t: solid

 c > c: bless

 h > h: you’re perfect, never change

contextually? a gut punch. yes, my brother is named Butch. and yes, he is a biiiiiiitch. hasn’t said a solid word to me since Blue’s Clues was canon. he’s mom’s flying monkey, perched right up her smelly drama-chimney.

and yet — he’s always accusing {different sib} of being “up dad’s ass.” he even once said, “there must be something sexual between them…” …which tells you where his brain lives. cool story, oedipus. so, you bangin mom ig. gross-ass gross.

anyway. dude stayed inside mom too long.

came out with long nails on fingers and toes, full head of long, and the deed to her spleen. planted a flag in her ute and currently shares the property with a co-op situation. man’s furnished her womb with seasonal timeshares & elaborate manses bescumbering dat hellbitch’s sulfur-lined nethers. i left moms brimstone palace early. just goes to show that vaiva didn’t raise no fool.

so when autocorrect drags zombie-butthole-Butch out of his choice grave in my mind while i’m just tryna type a lowercase bitch?

yeeee. his fuckin vibe hits. and her fuckin vibe hits. and life. it’s kinda triggering tbh.

to paraphrase Clerks — you never go bitch to Butch. unless you’re my phone. then you do it early and often.

and fwiw, when i type “bitch,” i often mean my mom anyway. she’s the bitch queen. i’m just the bitch princess, but I rescinded my title. she and all her poisoned-teat suckers …they’re the same person as far as i am concerned.

this entry was brought to you by the letter that was intended. The letter I — for incest — and interruption. 🤘