bad ad: caveman sex

By -


 “your daughter is pregnant and wants to marry a caveman. what will you do? give up for baby / accept.” dudes, what the actual?! this ad is hella weak sauce. it’s like someone thought “caveman quandary” was peak storytelling and just ran with it. what makes these ads so dumb? it’s not the graphics or the gameplay promises—it’s the language. the typos and weird phrasing are laughable. caveman baby dilemmas? it’s like they didn’t even try. honestly, cavemen could do better writing—and they didn’t even have spellcheck. this is beyond trashy, lmao. 





crapness rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ (for the comedy of errors) 


did i download it? absolutely not. into the bonestripper it goes.

Comments

Post a Comment

newest coolest hottest goss 🩸

Tarot: Wheel of Fortune

By -
Image
tarot card: the wheel of fortune -- cycles, change, acceptance. phyl’s “bunniversary” (not “gotcha day,” which i hate) is new year’s eve. i celebrate it because it’s special to us. her mullet haircut from summer has grown back. she’ll need another one soon. we’ve accepted the cycle.  i’ll snip slow and uneven again. she won’t care. punk rock girls don’t give a fuck. she’s got a mullet. she can see. life goes on. spritzing on my high-quality perfumes, especially lush, which gets good reactions. jessica’s anxiety is hitting hard, and i can feel the emotional weight it puts on her. not that i can fix it, buuutttttt i notice. tramp from lush… i miss it. smells like bitter herbs, and a forest floor -- tis a perfect distraction.
more of this shit »

💾 the dirty qwerty, #006: suit up, slut up, slur up, then shut up.

By -
Image
💾 the dirty qwerty, #006 suit up, slut up, slur up, then shut up. 🩸 “slut” → “suit” “slur” → “suit” “shit” → “suit” 🧠 keyboard logic: • l → u: side-eyeable neighbors • u → u: no notes • t → i → r: we’re getting loose, but we’ve seen worse • h → u: ok but WHY • r → i: this one feels personal • i → i: thx guy • s → s: yasssss look. it’s being auto-puritan. you’re mid-text, dropping a “what a dumb slur,” or “she was slutty and proud,” or just plain old “shit,” and suddenly autocorrect says: “dearie… don’t you mean suit?” and listen: i’m not shaming suits. i own one. but i am shaming the part of the code that keeps hijacking the language of pain, power, and poop… and redressing it in department store politeness. slut-shaming? slur-erasing? shit-washing yeah. it’s all the same glitch. m’phone is trying to censor my mess. but mess is where truth lives. this episode was brought to you by the letter S — for slut, slur, shit, motherfuckin snakes on a motherfucking plane, but not suit today. ...
more of this shit »

Assblasting Festival

By -
Image
From the Franiverse Wiki, the sacred source of lore and gastric terror. The Assblasting Festival is a core Franiverse blood orgy -- an official holiday. Celebrated annually by mortals, vampires, and Sims-based lifeforms, it is a metaphysical shitshow of digestive depravity. As one of the highest holy blood orgies, it’s a sacred, cursed, and utterly pooptacular event rooted in mass trauma and a metric fuckton of emotional gluten. Think Thanksgiving, but everyone’s dead, and the turkey is alive. The festival originated when Thorne accidentally served a cursed casserole laced with tainted plasma fruit. This infamous dish -- Gelatinous Soul Ambrosia Casserole -- was crafted from expired Makkabakka meats, ghost tears, and litterbox scraps. The result? Mass toilet casualties, soul docking (don’t let the casserole dock souls), and explosive bathroom Jackson Pollocks -- but not smelling like one. 🔪 The Grand Meal (The Last Slaughter) Participants consume spoiled or cursed food, triggerin...
more of this shit »

the big bad wolf’s growl…

By -
Image
moonmoon fanfic 😂 his growl wasn't just sound; it was a primal language resonating with presence, connection, and a raw, undeniable desire. she felt it instantly – a supernatural vibration that bypassed her impenetrable mind and spoke directly to her body. it was seductive, possessive, a silken assertion of his claim: i am here. i see you. i want you. he buried his face in her neck, inhaling the intoxicating blend of vanilla and jasmine clinging to her skin. the growl deepened, a low tremor that vibrated through her. the heat of his body pulsed against hers, his muscles rippling subtly under the soft fabric beneath her fingertips as she drew her arms around him. safety and desire melted into a delicious pool of fire within her, leaving her breathless… gasping for more… never enough. his exploration was animalistic in its intensity… a thorough, sensual investigation. he savored her scent, the feel of her skin, the very essence of her being. her ethereal sighs mingled with his...
more of this shit »